Who are my real friends?

I am starting to see who legitimately has my back and who doesn't. The guys who don't have my back some of them are still nice guys and I legitimately like them but not everyone is dependable. Not everyone makes a good friend. Some guys are good drinking buddies but I don't drink so that kind of friendship will fade fast! There are other guys who are good sports buddies. From April til August those guys will be my main amigos! There are also those guys who I can sit and talk with about life! We can be honest and share with each other without feeling judged.
I also find myself building stronger bonds with guys online through my lower surgery journey. I feel like talking to guys who "get it" is awesome. My friends who don't want lower surgery still support me are cool BUT they don't get it so somethings I would want to discuss with them would be out of place I feel.
I really am starting to see who my real friends are. I am also trying to get out of the habit of considering everyone friends just cause we talk or know the same people. I am getting comfortable with calling people my associate or a cool guy I know. There is nothing wrong with that I feel it's real. Some associates have now become friends and some friends have become associates that is part of life.

The thing that does bother me is when people pretend to be my friend or like me to my face (which is usually associated with them trying to get a favor out of me) but behind my back they are negative.
There is nothing anyone can say about me behind my back that will make me feel bad. If you don't like my top surgery so what at least I had surgery that is what was important to me! If you think I am stupid for getting a meta so what?!! If you want to have a say in the matter then pay for it! If you aren't gonna pay then shut the hell up!

I'm learning who my real friends are and connecting one on one with guys who I would like to develop healthy friendships with.

Letting go.

I have finding myself lately realizing that I need to let go. I always knew that once I got comfortable in my own skin that it would be easier for me to live life. What I realize more and more is that I can not completely move forward without letting go of a lot of stuff. I thought the only thing that I needed to let go of was the past. I realize that I also need to let go of a lot of the stress and hurt I have from not allowing myself to be happy. I also realize that even in my new happier shell I need to let go of the ways that I chose my friends as well as the different half ass ways of me justifying keeping toxic friends.

I find myself surveying my friends as well as associates lately. I feel like I have to asses for me who I need to keep in my life and who I really need to let go of. There are some people without question that must go due to how toxic they are for me and how they trigger negativity in me.

I find myself moving more in the direction of people goal oriented and focused on achieving those goals. Anyone can have goals but not everyone actual works towards achieving those goals. I need to move myself from being around people making excuses. I need to move myself away from people who constantly say "I can't". I have made a promise to myself that I will not utter the words "I can't" unless it is followed by the word fail. Me being able to say "I can't fail" is one of the most powerful statements that I could make in my pursuit of happiness and achieving my goals.

I have been spending more time with differnt people either by going out to eat with them or just sitting and talking about things of importance to us.
I find that this has helped me see who I could build a more quality relationship with and who is just around just because we "should be friends" since we are part of "The same community."

I used to feel like I had to get along with everyone if we were part of the same "community" but just because we share some sort of identity or social class does not make us need to be BFF! I used to feel bad for feeling this way but now I embrace it! It allows me to be more authentic in my friendships and connect with people because I want to and not because I have to!

I am living more for my quality of friends as opposed to quantity of friends.

Letting go of toxic ways and toxic people.